“What Am I Grateful For?”

When it comes to taking advice on happiness, I tend to trust the neuroscientists, the people who study brains and discover how they work. And they tell us that the key question to ask when we feel down is, “What am I grateful for?”

What About Dopamine?

Instead of gulping some pain killers, smoking weed, or downing a few drinks, why not search for something to be grateful for? Feeling grateful boosts dopamine, the “feel good” neurotransmitter activating the reward centers of our brain. Feeling grateful also activates the brain stem region, producing dopamine, as well as increasing activity in social dopamine circuits, making interpersonal interactions more enjoyable. Dopamine functions as the chemical released by neurons (nerve cells), sending signals to other nerve cells. Most addictive drugs increase dopamine neuronal activity. According to Dr. Gabor Mate, “Desire, wanting and craving are all incentive feelings, so it easy to see why dopamine is central to non-drug-related addictions too.”

Gratitude vs Resentments

Sometimes life delivers what feels like a kick in the stomach and it can feel as though there is nothing to be grateful for. Guess what? It doesn’t matter. It is the searching that counts! It is not finding gratitude that matters most, as merely remembering to be grateful is a form of emotional intelligence. What is interesting is that the mere ritual of obtaining and preparing their drug of addiction gives addicts/alcoholics a rush, just as asking “What am I grateful for?” does for any of us. There is an expression in addiction recovery, “A grateful addict is a clean addict.”, and we are often told that gratitude is the antidote to resentments. There is little doubt that resentments can easily lead to relapse.

Changes in the Brain

One study found that the searching actually affected neuron density in both the ventromedial and lateral prefrontal cortex. These density changes suggest that as emotional intelligence increases, the neurons in these areas become more efficient. With higher emotional intelligence, it simply takes less effort to be grateful. And gratitude doesn’t just make our brain happy – it can also create a positive feedback loop in our relationships – the community which can be our saving grace when things get tough. So why not express that gratitude to the people you care about?